Today's blog brings you the final "chapter" in the Be Love series. I hope you give yourself a chance to listen to the last hour-long show. It was a great conversation and we had a wonderful time. It was such an incredible journey this year with Kidest Om, the brilliant and powerful host of the show. I really look forward to sharing more time with her in the future. As we rolled out the chapters of Getting That You Matter together, Kidest added so much wisdom and depth to the conversations. I learned more about myself, and the book, in the process, and I feel like we took it to a deeper level together. For that I will always be grateful to her. She is truly an Angel on Earth.
Now it's already nearly mid-September and I'm feeling the "push" to get the book published. It's a daunting, scary and exciting process… and it's time to "just do it!"
I'm excited to launch our newsletter (if you are on our list, you'll get one for sure!) and to unveil the "new, improved" website soon. We'll introduce free downloads of some of my favorite GTYM materials, exciting new features for more interactivity, as well as pre-sale packages which will help get the book and other products off the ground in a big way.
In other words, things are happening! WOOHOO!
As we talked about in the previous show, it's not always easy to stay connected to why you matter. It's not always easy to get up when you've fallen down. (Boy, do I know that one!) That's why it's so important to make your purpose the foundation upon which everything is built. When you do, everything falls into alignment with it instead of trying to fit it into your available spaces of time and attention.
When you're committed to living a life of purpose, you're able to keep your "eyes on the prize" as you go through your daily life. Without it, you tend to do what's there in front of you – whether it's going to move you forward or not.
Creating structures that help you to stay connected to your purpose also help. It helps to remember that, in keeping your eyes on the prize, it's your job to do the daily footwork and it's the Universe's job to take care of how it will unfold. Remember, too, to build in down time as part of your life. The beauty of this is that, contrary to the popular idea of staying in constant motion to be doing more, making more and getting more, you can actually be more productive when you're feeling cared for and rested.
This also means staying flexible – allowing for the changes and unforeseen events that inevitably happen in your life. When you allow for these things in the context of being wholeheartedly committed to your purpose, you're not shaken as deeply as when you're just trying to get through the day.
Remember, things that are inflexible are also often far more breakable. A friend of mine says, "I like to Tai Chi the things that are coming at me." What he means by that is, instead of putting up a wall of resistance to challenges, he allows things to flow past him with grace and ease. This allows him to use the energy of what's coming toward him instead of fighting against it.
In addition, it's important to do whatever you need to do to remember and keep your agreements (the ones we talked about in chapter five). With these in place, you give yourself everything you need to move forward with your creative endeavors – because, actually, everything you do is a creative act.
One of the beautiful things about being human is that you are infinitely creative. Whether you are aware of it or not, everything you do is an act of creativity. Think about it, even negative self-talk or bad behavior is creative. The thing is, it's up to you what direction you want your creative energy to take. Whether what you're doing serves you or not, you're creating it!
Staying connected to your passion and purpose requires diligence and conscious effort; it's not a quick fix or plastic surgery. It's also not about always living from a place of "positive thinking" either. Staying connected requires that you dive into your emotions, connect to your heart and your passion about why you are here on the planet and who you are here to be.
Joanna Macy, one of the foremost authorities on deep ecology and a woman I admire greatly and with whom I had the great fortune to study many years ago, teaches that we must feel our despair about what's happening in the world in order to reconnect with our passion and with each other in order to reconnect to our greatest passion, joy and compassion for ourselves, each other and the world.
Debbie Ford asserts that you must dive into the shadows of yourself and bring to light the things about yourself of which you are most ashamed in order to live whole, complete life. In other words, as Debbie says, "The gold is in the dark." And it's not just our despair and pain that we need to expose and express, it's also our joy and self-celebration. We must give ourselves the gift of being fully human.
These are not new concepts, but they are critical to getting that you matter. The important thing is to treat every experience, every interaction, every opportunity as if it is brand new, as if you are encountering it for the very first time. In other words, getting that you matter requires you to live from a place of "Beginner's Mind."
How you choose to see and experience yourself and everything around you is the key to getting that you matter. You can choose to believe the old story that you don't matter, that you don't have an impact and continue down this path of unconsciousness. Or you can choose to live in Beginner's Mind every day, believing that you do matter, that you have an undeniable impact on the world around you.
The reason I wrote this book in the first place was because I see so many people going through their lives in a fog or on automatic pilot, not connected to their purpose and behaving as if they have no idea of their impact on the world. You matter, whether you are aware of it or not, and it is imperative that you understand that. The world needs you to wake up, to see what you've been doing that was unconscious and to make any necessary changes to shift from that state of unconsciousness in order to do your part to contribute to the greater good.
In the end, how can you not fulfill your purpose and do what you are ultimately here to do? In other words, how can you not matter? We are innately connected and thus have the most profound impact on each other and everything around us. The Native elders of this continent had it right when they said, “Whatever touches one part of the web, touches all of it.” We cannot separate ourselves; we are not, and never will be, islands. You matter and the world needs you now.
Meditation for Remembering That You Matter
“Looking back on my experiences of doing this work, what has changed about how I get that I matter?"
Take some time to journal about what has shifted for you in doing the homework. How do you see yourself differently? How you are choosing to show up now? What will you do to really stretch into this new space of getting that you matter?
Mantra for Remembering That You Matter
"I Matter… Always!"
What phrase, like this one, could you say to yourself that would remind you that you matter, especially in the times when you have fallen down. Remember, you'll feel it in your heart and it will make you blush a bit. Then remember to post it in as many places as possible so you won't forget!
Movement for Remembering That You Matter
Now that you really get how much you matter, I encourage you to go out and do at least one thing that is out of your comfort zone (or out-of-the-box for you) that will stretch you into acting in alignment with your Vision and Purpose. And remember to celebrate yourself, too!