There's nothing quite like making our commitments public to really hold ourselves accountable. So, I have decided to begin this New Year (the way I see it, January 20th was the official New Year!) by blogging a lot more often (I'm not willing to commit to a daily thing- waaaay too much!) in order to hold myself accountable to what I say I want to create and as a way to keep my commitment to writing much more tangible this year. So, if you are reading this, thank you for being my invisible "Accountability Buddy" ...and, as they say, "Carpe diem!"
I want to expose my internal dialogues and share them with others so they can see that even someone like me, who speaks to her dreams and visions and talks about all I've got going on in a really positive upbeat way, struggles with issues like confidence, discipline and motivation. Just because I'm writing a book, working on my music and coaching doesn't mean I don't wrestle with these things; as a matter of fact, I'd venture to say that folks who are working toward things that mean a lot to them, who have big goals and grand visions, probably wrestle with these issues even more than the "average Joe" in large part because of the vastness of their sense of responsibility to, not just their family and/or community but, the whole world at large. I sometimes find it challenging, as if in making my declaration to the world that I'm a writer, musician and coach, to live up to my own expectations and the expectations I've set up others to have of me, too.
I think it's a real fallacy people buy into that sets up famous and/or powerful motivators, speakers, actors, musicians, writers, politicians and other leaders to be perfect, to "have it all together." And, let me be clear now, I’m not lumping myself in with that group of folks – YET! What I am saying, though, is that I believe, whether someone is "already there" or they are "on their way," they need to remember and honor that they are not machines that can go and go without taking breaks, without down time and self-care. They need to remember and honor their humanity.
Having said that, I am recommitting to my writing and my music, to getting "out there" as much as possible and, at the same time, to taking impeccable care of myself in the process. I commit to my meditation, my exercise and my good eating habits. I commit to continuing to keep my personal space free of clutter and distractions. I commit to loving myself so much that it feeds my heart and soul and fires my internal flame in a way that brings incredible power to my actions "out there," whatever they may be.
I know we all fall on our diapers, mess up, take two steps back or slack off from time to time. We all do that. But it is my intention to always get back up, clean it up, take 4 steps forward and give myself the down time I need to regenerate and rejuvenate for the journey. Even when I fall down for weeks at a time, I'm not going to use that as an excuse to beat myself up or go into a depression. I'm choosing to use it as a lesson for myself in humility and grace. As long as I can call up on those two qualities, I believe I'll be able to do anything I was put here to do!